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Total Mind Fuck
Diphenhydramine (Benadryl)
Citation:   Ex-tripper. "Total Mind Fuck: An Experience with Diphenhydramine (Benadryl) (exp23749)". Erowid.org. Jun 19, 2007. erowid.org/exp/23749

 
DOSE:
24 tablets oral Diphenhydramine
BODY WEIGHT: 180 lb
I was an avid fan of hallucinogens and had tripped on LSD, shrooms, DXM often. None of my tripping experiences even approached a Benadryl trip. I tripped on Benadryl approximately three times--two times too many however. I will say that the trip is such an utter mind-fuck that I tripped two more times just to confirm to myself (because it was so unbelievably fucked up) how crazy and intense the experience is.

The first time I tripped on Benadryl was in 1996 while I was a sophomore in college. I was at home for the summer and my parents were out of town for the week. I had heard that I could trip on diphenhydramine so I bought a box and ate the caps. I remember sitting down and listening to music--about 30 minutes into the trip, I noticed that music started to have a pretty cool depth to it--kind of a darker edge to it however (I was into hard house at the time). Soon thereafter, I noticed this gelatin-like substance that was very subtle--it congregated and moved around every object that I looked at. I didn't necessarily feel threatened by it, but I remember that it just kind of spooky. All in all, the trip has a sinister feel to it.

Anyway, there was a part of the CD I was listening to that sounded REALLY cool and I kept trying to rewind and listen to it again, but when I hit play and that part of the CD passed, I forgot that I wanted to listen to it and had to keep rewinding it. I became very forgetful. I would say that I was probably an hour or 90 minutes into the trip by this point. I was staring at the door and all of the sudden a TV appeared and an 'Itchy and Scratchy' (or something like that) came on and I just remember it was a very violent cartoon scene. I turned to my friends beside me and was like, 'Did you see that,' then looked back to the door and nothing was there. I looked back to my friends and they also had disappeared. After this point, I don't really know what sequence things happened...time pretty much became a non-issue.

Auditory hallucinations became really bad. Any internal dialogue that I had ended up being projected outwards. So all of my internal dialogue was occurring as if *someone else* (beside me or in another room, etc.) was talking to me, and I would try and respond. Also, I kept hearing my name being called--freaky. I would always answer to that now 'external dialogue' or my name but would forget halfway through my sentence what I was saying and then would say, 'oh, I forgot.' I can't tell you how many times that happened.

The rest of the night I found myself wandering throughout the house trying to 'enjoy the rest of my night' as if I wasn't fucked up--like I forgot I took the pills in the first place. I ended up talking to inanimate objects like lamps and things that would appear to me (at first) as people I know (friends and family) and then would disappear before my eyes. When they disappeared and I saw that I was talking to a fridge or a lamp, I got very anxious and very uncomfortable. I also remember my heart pounding pretty hard (it's a bit rough on your heart). I saw people sitting outside of windows and was really paranoid. I had constant company--which was absolutely nerve-wracking but in a weird way, made me feel like I was having a normal night, but everything would jolt into perspective when something that I was talking to would disappear--it had the psychological feel of acid (when I am peaking)--very segmented--everything (mostly conversations) seemed to end but nothing ever began or started. In retrospect, it was quite awful.

I got ready for bed thinking that if I went to sleep the whole thing would be over, but the auditory hallucinations were absolutely awful. I remember laying in bed, frequently talking out loud to other people or things--to me, it made sense, but only because I was fucked up--to an observer, it is pure gibberish. One other thing that was annoying was thinking that I had chores or things to do that day that were totally made up in my head. I would think about an appointment I had to make, or how I needed to put the clothes in the dryer or something of that nature--but none of these things made any sense--I didn't have an appointment, nor did I do any laundry that day.

The next day was pretty depressing. I walked downstairs and say the empty package of Benadryl and just kind of let out a deep sigh. I felt hungover--and not very 'enlightened.' The trip was actually scary and again, it has a very dark, sinister feel to it. It is very hard to explain but those who have done it would understand. Seriously, the trip is an utter mindfuck. The visual and auditory hallucinations are so real that you cannot discern between reality and non-reality. I could easily see someone doing something stupid or hurting themselves on this trip.

I personally confirmed this narrative by tripping on Benadryl two more times. Don't ask--like I said, I was really into tripping at the time.

Exp Year: 1996ExpID: 23749
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jun 19, 2007Views: 16,805
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Diphenhydramine (109) : Alone (16), Entities / Beings (37), First Times (2)

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